Dear family and friends,

Please help raise funds to support the work of an incredible local charity - Cancer Support WA.  

You can show your support by sponsoring my portrait - a beautiful glass photographic portrait of myself by world-renowned portrait and fashion photographer Robbie Merritt.   

My story is below.

Thank you,

Sharon Barrey (Grassick)

 My Fabulous Life

I’ve had a great life, with so many opportunities:  I studied hard; (maybe partied harder); earned several degrees; traveled extensively; married a wonderful man and moved half-way around the world; raised a gorgeous son; worked in a job I love, skied, swam, sailed.  Life has been good.  I’ve also survived cancer three times.

First diagnosis 1993: 

A routine mammogram found cancer in my left breast, requiring lumpectomy and lymphectomy.  Son Rob was only 7 years old; we were devastated. How in the world do you explain cancer to a child? I still have a tiny balloon heart he brought to me in hospital just before surgery. That heart has become a part of my heart.  Some things I can never part with…and that is one of them.

With support from family and friends, I sailed through the surgery. In fact, I started a new job the same day that daily radiotherapy commenced.  I believe that a positive focus on work, that I was so passionate about, is what kept me going at the time.  The challenge of a new role working with people with Deafblindness and their families meant I had to focus on others and something other than cancer.  Just before Christmas I was given the ‘all-clear’ – the best present ever! 

Little did I know that this was just the beginning of a very long and sometimes seemingly endless journey.

Second diagnosis 1999:

Having been cancer-free for 6 years, a mammogram then found a tumour in my other breast, this time requiring mastectomy - totally taking the wind out of my sails.  I opted to have bilateral mastectomy, as I could see no point in having ¾ of one breast left hanging around.  A benefit of making the decision for bilateral mastectomy, with no option of reconstruction at the time, is that I can now swim much faster, with no boob drag.  Another bonus is that the money I would have spent on expensive bras, I now spend on expensive scarves to ‘enhance’ my flat, bony chest!

Life continued to be busy, with work often frantic and stressful; learning Tai Chi added a breathtaking dimension to my life, which was still great.  After all, I had survived cancer – twice! 

Third diagnosis 2011: 

12 cancer-free years later, my 29-year marriage was suddenly and unexpectedly over.  With the trauma of separation still raw, 5 months later I was diagnosed yet again with cancer - this time in the bowel, with multiple liver metastases.  

Surely this couldn’t be happening – not to my wonderful life!

This horrid diagnosis, following hot on the heels of the separation, sent shock waves throughout the very core of my being.  I simply couldn’t believe all that was going on…I felt like an emotional tsunami had engulfed me.  How can I possibly have cancer – again!  This is just too - unfair!

A grim prognosis and ‘life-long’ chemo ruled my life for 11 months.  Fortunately, I was encouraged to seek a second opinion, which offered surgery as an option .  After careful review, I was told quite frankly that the surgeries would be very risky and at any stage of the 4 stage surgeries, they may not be able to proceed.  I was ready for the fight of my life.

‘Three strikes and you’re out’ – or – ‘Three times lucky’?  I chose the latter to believe in.   All went very well and 4 months later scans showed no trace of nasty cells.  I had survived Sir Bastard the 3^rd!

With hindsight, there is much I would do differently. I cannot recall any supports available for my husband and son.  It was all about me - for a long time.  Loved ones need to be cared for and supported through the crisis of cancer too.

My great hope is that people reading my story will help drive my dream for more attention to and support for loved ones, who not only care about us and for us, but live the fear, grief, pain and suffering - perhaps in more ways than we will ever know.   They share the experience with us, from shock of diagnosis, through surgery, treatment and recovery; and hopefully through the joy of survival.  I now wonder how much recognition, if any, my husband had ever been given for his enormous love and support at the time – from me or from anyone else.  Perhaps he’ll read this and know how very much I appreciated all that he gave of himself when I really needed him by my side.   For that I will always be grateful.

Hopes and Dreams

The wee photo I’m holding is of our baby son, with whom I have a renewed relationship.   Rob has moved back home and is helping to support me; making sure I eat properly and do the ‘right thing’.  I am so proud of the wonderful and compassionate young man he has become.  The round frame symbolizes my determination to keep my life in balance, like the Tai Chi circle, and not allow work to overcome, as it has in the past.  My hands look like a shape of Australia; this was unintentional, but I can see how they could symbolize my marrying and moving to Australia from the US 32 years ago.  The medical treatment I have received here in WA is World Class.  My hands also symbolize my work in touch communication with people who are deafblind.  The pearl I wear is a whole other story…for another time.

Even though a recent scan has shown a wee ‘blip’, it is treatable – and I will beat it yet again.  I have every intention of continuing to have a fabulous life. The children who are deafblind I have worked with and their families have inspired me in more ways than they can ever imagine.  They have survived a different kind of adversity; their resolve and determination have given me the strength and positive attitude I need to beat this.  And I will.  I still have work and fun things I need to do, people I want to see and places I want to go.  Yes, I will survive…with a little help from my friends.

I am so fortunate to have such wonderful friends, from all corners of the earth and all walks of life, who have given so freely of their time and energy to support me. My son and exceptional friends have been the backbone of a new life built on caring, confidence and laughter.  I love you and thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Thank you,

Sharon Barrey (Grassick)